Our long time readers will remember Promo Bono from back when the new millennium was fresh, Florida was in the middle of re-counting votes and people still believed everything we wrote. One reader in particular who shall remain unnamed (elmo, Ed.) recently asked “and where IS Promo Bono?”. Good question. Read on for the full story.
Searching through our archives provided some clues that would lead to the whereabouts of our little limited edition friend.
At first we thought he might have been sold on eBay. But that was an imposter. Another story claimed Promo Bono was seen at a garage sale, a pricetag firmly tied to his cuban heels. We were afraid we may have lost him forever.
Then we were contacted by [name withheld], a long time fan who found Promo Bono in the attic of the house of an acquaintance who used to work as a lightning rod engineer. Strings were pulled, nails were chewed and after many weeks arrangements were made for Promo Bono’s return to his makers. We were glad to have our prodigal son back in our hands. Even if he looked a bit rough.
After major plastic surgery on the scalp, a complete make over and some tight new shrinkwrap, we were able to conduct a short interview with the recovering Promo Bono.
U2log.com: It’s good to see you again, Promo Bono. Where have you been?
Promo Bono: Besides that attic you mean? Around the world and back again. I got eaten by a wolf, my staff have been lobbying for me to become Monopoly banker and I am pursuing this clothing designer gig with my wife. Have I told you she’s extraordinary?
U2log.com: Many times. Now, you’re turning 45 this year. What would you like for your birthday?
Promo Bono Well…
U2log.com: Excellent choice, you got it.
Promo Bono: Actually, I want some ventilation holes in this shrinkwrap. These jeans are starting to ming and I’m starting to get itchy feet.
U2log.com: Perhaps it’s time for you to get up on stage. Anything else you’d like to ask us?
Promo Bono: Where is the love? No, scratch that… where’s my Plastic Promo Band?
U2log.com: (Sigh) Promo Bono, as usual they are waiting for YOU to walk through the room. How do you feel about going out on tour again?
Promo Bono: Live is where we live, to borrow a phrase of Larry’s. I can’t wait to hear what these new songs are like live. The Edge is falling in love with the guitar again, see, and we’re ready to reapply for the job.
U2log.com: Sounds familiar. Still, we can’t wait! Thanks for taking time to speak to us.
Promo Bono: Thank you. Now, tell me, what exactly is an iPod?